Whose Expectations Are These, Anyway?
There’s something strange about asking other people whether the life you want is worth trying. You explain the idea, walk them through the plan, tell them why it matters. Then one uncomfortable pause or a slightly concerned “Are you sure?” makes the whole thing feel ridiculous.
Suddenly, you’re defending a decision you haven’t even made yet.
We want to trust ourselves, but we’d really appreciate it if everyone else could approve first. Preferably in writing… Maybe with a lil certificate or something. Because what if they’re right? What if we fail?
Fair questions. But here’s another one: What happens if we keep choosing things we don’t want because we’re afraid someone else will be disappointed?
That deserves some deep, deep consideration, my friend.
Approval Can Get Expensive
Wanting approval makes sense, I suppose. We as humans inherintley care about people. Most of us would prefer to get through dinner without turning our future into a group discussion. The trouble starts when being dependable turns into being whatever makes everyone else comfortable.
Take the job that sounds impressive, and why not just keep doing the thing people think you should have outgrown? No, fuck it. Put the idea away until you can guarantee nobody will think it’s stupid.
These choices can seem practical. But they add up. Eventually, you can become very good at maintaining a life you barely had a say in.